I Love My Rock ‘N’ Roll Boyfriends

I Love My Rock N Roll Boyfriends

As Joan Jett once said, I love Rock ‘N’ Roll. 

Everything about it is electric! The music, fashion, lifestyle. The amount of trouble I would have found myself in as a young adult in the 1980s would have sent my parents into a conniption!

Mostly because the best parts of Rock ‘N’ Roll are the enigmatic musicians. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am well aware that all of my favorite Rock ‘N’ Roll boys have the delicious ability to break my heart into a million pieces. Send me spiraling into a haze of Adele, M&M McFlurries and long rants bothering every poor sap I have on my Snapchat private story. BUT, maybe the talent makes it all worth it? Well, we’re about to find out! Enlighten me as I go starry-eyed over my favorite tattooed, leather-coated, bad boys just in time for Valentine’s Day. 

Johnny Cash

The first time I was ever exposed to Johnny Cash, I fell into his ring of fire. It was a lazy afternoon and I felt like bothering somebody so naturally I sauntered out of my room to go dump my adolescent angst on my mother. She was sitting in the big, brown chair we’ve had since the beginning of time and was viewing some movie on our cable television. I gazed up at the screen to see the award-winning oddity that is Jaoquin Phoenix and southern charmer Reese Witherspoon. Not to go full movie nerd but Walk the Line is one of the best celebrity biopics ever made. Johnny Cash’s Man in Black attire, deep voice, introverted personality and Ray-Ban sunglasses had me questioning, was I born in the wrong era? Could he have been my soulmate? Everything I want in a man AND HE IS A ROCKSTAR?! But then I learned a little bit more about him and June Carter. The Grammy-winning singer songwriter is famous and successful in her own right. Coming from a family of talented musicians, she and Johnny went back and forth for a while before settling down and tying the knot. She’d been married twice with two daughters, and he had a longtime wife with two daughters of his own. Johnny’s first wife Vivian Liberto was said to have been an amazing woman, but there was no denying the fire and chemistry between June & Johnny onstage and off. June was the first to pass away from complications with heart surgery. Four months later, Johnny followed because of complications with his diabetes. However, the secret mushy romantic in me chooses to believe he just couldn’t live without her similar to Ally and Noah from Nicholas Sparks’s The Notebook. Johnny Cash’s resilience is what makes him so captivating. A father who never showed respect or an ounce of pride, his best friend and brother Jack who died young, and like most rockstars, an ongoing battle with addiction. What people neglect to realize about musicians in general  is that most of them were dealt an unfortunate hand of cards. Why do you think they have the capacity to pour their emotions out into song and bring people together? But I digress… Moral of the story? John R. Cash is awesome.

Tommy Lee

Thomas Lee Bass, otherwise known as Tommy Lee, is a lot of different things. A founding member of an iconic ’80s rock band, a talented drummer, a millionaire, and a Hollywood Walk of Fame inductee. A believer in long-lasting marriages? Yeah… that is certainly not one of them. The self-proclaimed “hopeless romantic” has made a trip down the aisle four times. Model Elaine Starchuck from 1984-1985, America’s 1980s soap-opera sweetheart Heather Locklear from 1986-1993, everybody’s favorite lifeguard Pamela Anderson from 1995-1998, and wrapping it up with Vine and TikTok star Brittany Furlan who he’s been married to since 2019. Now I have read the Crüe’s autobiography, The Dirt: Confessions of The World’s Most Notorious Rock Band. Tommy and the rest of the guys surely do not hold back on the graphic, blushed-cheek-inducing situations they found themselves in all over the world. I choose to reward their honesty by giving them the title of being inherently good people. Were they given too much leeway? AB-SO-LUTELY! However, according to Brittney Furlan’s TikTok account, (which I am an avid follower of) , Tommy Lee now goes to bed at approximately 8:30 and is an avid grower and collector of Bonsai trees. I am a total Tommy Lee apologist! Passion is what gives him his loose morals but insane understanding of good music. See how much I love him? I am a writer and cannot compute a negative thing to say about him. Totally toxic… 

Nikki Sixx

I know, I know, again with the Mötley Mën, Ava? But I refuse to take criticism! It’s not like I am the first woman in history to swoon for bad boy shenanigans. Nikki Sixx, the ubertalented bassist and songwriter of the Crüe, comes second to Tommy with three wedding marches. If I had to assign a superlative to each of the guys, Nikki Sixx would definitely be the backbone of the band. Not to say he doesn’t come with his own baggage: abandonment issues from his out-of-the-picture father, sending his emotionally abusive mother to jail, and a couple of failed overdoses [[delete?? are just some of the obstacles that this long and winding road we call life has placed in front of him]]. And yet? He now resides in San Jose with his wife Courtney and a young daughter they share named Ruby. Nikki Sixx’s magic word would be committed. Again, this can be perceived as a positive or a negative depending on the sentence to follow.

Committed to breaking the hearts of groupies….

Committed to making poor decisions while under the influence…

Committed to leading the charge of a notorious rock band that changed the Rock ‘N’ Roll game forever… 

Elvis Presley

You expected me to talk about my Rock ‘N’ Roll boyfriends and not include the King? I mean to put it in layman’s terms this guy is attractive and charming with a capital C-H-A-R-M! I grew up on Elvis’s dance-inducing music and less-than-stellar but ever-so-watchable movies. My dad and I’s personal favorite is Blue Hawaii. To give a brief synopsis of the film, Elvis (or Chadwick) returns home to Hawaii after being discharged from the U.S. Army. His family is pressuring him to work for their pineapple business, but much to their chagrin, he decides to work as a tour guide at the same resort of his girlfriend Maile. He serenades her with a little ditty called “Almost Always True,” which is quite literally about him barely cheating on her during his time away. The whole time she was smiling and giggling, and my little feet were bouncing and hands clapping to dreamy-eyed Elvis…admitting to adultery! In fact, I’m listening to the song now in theater class, and I am forced to refrain from jumping up out of my seat and doing a little jig. I know you all are anxious to find out if there is a happy ending and I’m happy to report it ends with your classic, lavish, Hawaiian wedding. In reality however, only one woman was ever able to get Elvis to walk down the aisle, and that would be Mrs. Priscilla Presley. To reference Miranda Lambert’s song about the legend herself: “It’s a difficult thing being Queen to the King.” I give Priscilla copious amounts of credit for putting up with his behavior for the six years they were married. Though the marriage ended in divorce, with Elvis passing just four years later, Priscilla Presley has put in the work to ensure that his legacy carries on from generation to generation. With his talent though, she doesn’t even need to lift a finger. He wasn’t just an excellent singer. Elvis’s showmanship is what makes him who he is. With his light eyes and glittery garb you cannot help but watch him. And that esteemed readers, is why he is the king of Rock ‘N’ Roll. Thank you, thank you very much.

Machine Gun Kelly

I had tickets to a festival he was performing at. I bought the ticket specifically so that I could see him. I purchased a new outfit from my favorite place ever, FashionNova. I looked good; even great you could say. On the way out there, my friend Laurel and I found out it was canceled. I still try not to hold a grudge about it to this day. Because, this brings us to my fifth and final Rock ‘N’ Roll boyfriend, Machine Gun Kelly. Before the fame, he was an awkward, scrawny, poor kid born in Houston, and raised in Cleveland with his dad and aunt. By the age of eighteen, he had a daughter named Casie with his out-of-the-spotlight ex-girlfriend Emma Cannon. Now? He is a millionaire rapper, producer, actor and rock star. His daughter is a teenager, he’s newly engaged to Megan Fox (yes, I almost cried about it), and he is touring all over the world. Except for Florida obviously, which is the reason I ended the night previously mentioned not headbanging to his songs but rather drinking Slurpees in a church parking lot with a group of my friends. Sticks and stones , I guess? The craziest part of all this is that Machine Gun Kelly played Tommy Lee in the Mötley Crüe biopic. I know my obsession is unhealthy… Not to play favorites however, because Machine Gun Kelly has inserted himself into his own fair share of cancel-worthy situations. Starting beef with Eminem, getting a little too cocky on twitter at 19, and rumored to have been snobby and rude with fans. We all have our stuff, right? I have never met a soul who hasn’t regretted something they said or did when they were younger. I know it’s important to keep celebrities in check because their fans put them on pedestals, however, they are also human beings. Capable of being overwhelmed, stressed, angry, lustful, or any of the other seven deadly sins. With that being said, I will be getting nice and emo to his album “Tickets to My Downfall” for years to come and you should, too. By the way? Did you see that rock he gave Megan? He obviously has a deep care and respect for women. If only I was older…. *Sigh*

ATTENTION: You have reached the end of your Rock ‘N’ Roll history lesson and my thirstful adoration of rock icons. BUT, there is one more thing I want to talk about. It walks the line of serious and controversial. 

In the name of being honest, when I first started this piece, I wanted to be able to answer a question:


You know what I’m talking about. Michael Jackson, Morgan Wallen, R.Kelly, Brendon Urie. And that’s just music. In fiction, J.K. Rowling. In movies, Armie Hammer.

I have never taken ethics, and am nowhere near the pinnacle for moral compasses. I am also the queen of bold and brash opinions. But I have to admit, this one throws me for a loop. 

I’m a friend to the people! I want to hear what you have to say. Leave a comment or participate in the poll. Or if you want to keep it light, tell me who your Rock ‘N’ Roll boyfriend or girlfriend is. 

I started with Joan Jett and I’ll end with her too: “I’ve always got something to say.” 

Till next time, ladies and gentlemen!


This poll has ended.

Can you separate the art from the artist?


Sorry, there was an error loading this poll.